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Wake Up Calls: Why They Manifest and My Ugliest One Yet

Wake up calls come in all different shapes and sizes but most of the time they are pretty ugly and can hurt like hell. I had a major one this year, definitely the biggest one I've experienced yet, and I'd say was very similar to being stabbed in the eye with a hot poker but I am very grateful that I wasn't actually stabbed, my butt was just kicked into the highest gear possible as a result.

I want to fill you in on the whole backstory so you can really see how every step I took lead up to this defining moment when everything I thought I had 'built' came crashing down... and thank Jesus, Mary and Joseph for that.

After getting heavily into the whole fitness world I decided that this year I would complete the qualifications so I could work as a 'fitness professional' in the industry. It seemed a solid and stable plan that would lead to a full-time job and as a girl who just wants to stretch her wings and fly it seemed like a easy way to help make that happen. My higher self would've known the whole damn time that following a career with no creativity, art or self-expression was a STUPID idea but I obviously had to dip my toe in the water and find that out for myself.

I had managed to score an interview with an owner of a gym about completing the second half of my qualifications under an internship, something that seemed very promising and would look great on a resume *cue gagging noises*. I had to have been brainwashed during this period to have even considered the way something would 'look good on a resume' as I couldn't give a flying fuck about those kinds of details. I also wouldn't voluntarily run into a hot poker but it seems that's what I did.

The dude is a sociopath. Dead ass. I sat across from this man during this so called 'interview' for half an hour which was in fact just a psychological interrogation for him to pick apart me for all that I am only to write it on a whiteboard and rub my nose in the flaws and loopholes. He found there to be no issues in handing on his two highly knowledgeable cents that 'have no drive, no dreams and no goals' and I'm 'not a good enough investment for his business'. As you can imagine I walked away fuming, I was not sad or upset but fuming and because of two reasons, the first being that I had just had this inappropriate and abusive encounter with someone who was highly regarded and accredited and the second which I didn't even dawn on me till later, that he hit the bullseye... when it came to fitness industry dreams and plans that is, bitch ain't got no clue how bad I'm gonna fuck shit up elsewhere.

Now I'm not going to sit here and thank the guy for being the biggest turd to known human kind but at the same time I kind of am? If I take a step outside of who I am in this life and let go of what I want it to look like or my egos point of view of the situation I can see clearly why this happened the way it did. If he did not come into my reality and tell me it straight up that I was not going to have success down this career path I would've kept walking blindly down a road I did not pave that was safe and predictable, something I never planned nor want to be.

Because of this man and his poor behavior I got shook up so much that the delusional comatose shell I got so comfortable and didn't even notice I was in, snapped in half. I was not happy all the while managing to fool myself into believing that the flowers I was promised were fresh and handpicked just for me when in fact they were fake and in the discounted bin at Kmart. I am in no way excusing his poor actions but in acting so terrible he did me the biggest favour. He also pissed on his chips because I am solid G.O.L.D. baby.

This is what I mean when I say wake up calls can be nasty and flip your world upside down but they don't happen without a reason. There is no luck or coincidences as everything comes into your reality at precise timing because you need to learn something from it in order to expand and if you choose not to in that moment don't be surprised if it manifests again. These moments are not to scare you but to hopefully wake you up because you're straying too far off the path (even though you can't be because everything happens for a reason.. this universe shit is never ending I swear) and you need to bump your fine booty back on again.

Following your heart, bliss, calling, peace, whatever you want to call it, is genuinely the safest option you can choose because it makes you happy and when you're happy you couldn't give a flying fuck about whether it looks good on your resume or not. So make art, make love and do YOUR thing and by doing so you'll probably limit the need for wake up calls because you'll be on track already.

Namaste y'all.
Love, Delilah.

P.S. He told me him and his wife found my introductory email really funny and entertaining so I guess the signs were there all along. God bless.

✩✩✩

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